6 Things I’ve Given Up That Have Drastically Improved My Life

Life has been garbage lately.

However, every day I’m trying to shift my mindset and stop being so dramatic about everything.

Life has been rough. Sometimes it feels like there isn’t a single thing to be happy about, and then I remember that I swore to myself I’d stop being so dramatic. lol.

We’re 6 months into 2023. How wild is that? My year started off to a rocky start, but fortunately, there are a few things that have made me feel like there’s a light at the end of the tunnel.

With that said, here are a few things I’ve given up (or am in the process of giving up) that are helping me turn my life around for the better.

1. Hormonal Birth Control

Ugh, this is a topic I can’t wait to dive into in a future article. I was on birth control for almost a decade. I tried hormonal pills and the copper IUD.

For some people, it’s fine and doesn’t do a significant amount of damage, although I believe that on a metabolic level, it does. That’s just my opinion.

If you really think about it, you can’t make yourself infertile through drugs without some sort of negative side effects.

I got on the pill because I was uneducated and didn’t want to have a period.

Looking back at those reasons, I want to slap the crap out of myself.

“You didn’t want to have a period? Are you stupid? So many women out there don’t have one, and all they want is to be normal and have a regular cycle.”

The hormonal pills worked fine, and I didn’t have any external issues that I noticed, but everybody is different. When I tried a different version of the pills I was taking, I gained a ton of weight and had painful pimples popping up left and right. I was angry, moody, erratic, and extremely sad.

I tried the copper IUD, which caused a lot of abdominal pain, and despite it being non-hormonal, I didn’t feel like myself at all.

Almost 6 months ago, I decided to stop taking the pills and start tracking my cycle. This was a pretty big decision, but it was the best decision I’ve ever made in my life.

I feel everything. I love having a period. I love tracking my cycle. I love learning about my body and how it functions throughout each phase.

I love being a woman, and I’m embracing everything that comes with it. Even if sometimes, it’s a little crampy. Pun intended.

2. Wondering or Caring About What Others Think of Me

There were days when I wondered what my aunt and uncle thought of me, living in Los Angeles with my boyfriend, unmarried. “They probably think I’m such a sinner,” I’d think to myself and scowl.

• “Do people think I’m a loser when they watch my YouTube videos? I look so bad.”

• “My favorite influencer only drinks matcha. Should I give up my coffee addiction and follow in her footsteps so I could be just like her?”

• “Should I start wearing low-rise jeans because everybody else is going back to those? I don’t want to be that dork hiding my pooch in my mom jeans!”

When I have a daughter, I pray to God those stupid and idiotic thoughts don’t permeate her mind. There’s so much more to life than worrying or caring, or even thinking about what others think of you.

3. Hardcore Dieting

Oh gosh, for years, I’d go to my favorite little breakfast joint in Venice Beach for my delicious acai bowl. I had 1 per week. I counted down the hours till I could eat that delicious thing.

And every time I got it, my granola would be on the side, and I’d never get banana because God forbid I have that many carbs on top of the carbs I was already consuming from the acai.

I didn’t eat bananas for years. I’d have a spoon of granola and try to walk it off. Pasta was considered a cheat meal. Dessert? I didn’t know her. I thought about food every second of the day.

Screw it all. I’m all for being healthy; I’m all for dieting if you’re overweight and overeating on a daily basis, but I’m done with counting calories like my life depends on it.

When I go to Italy, I will indulge in all the pasta, wine, and pizza. And there will be zero shame.

4. Restrictiveness Within My Daily Routine

My schedule has always been M-F work hard, Friday night to Saturday night, have fun, Sunday is a reset day, and then back to it Monday.

No drinking during the week, no going out, no fun; if you don’t grind and hustle, you’re a loser.

While things aren’t completely different now because I have a lot of trouble releasing control, I’m actively trying not to be so rigid.

It’s okay to go out on a Wednesday night. It’s okay to have a glass of wine after a stressful day during the week. No, you don’t need to be in bed by 9 pm sharp otherwise, the following day will be completely ruined. Relax.

Live a little.

5. Trying To Follow Politics

I used to tell my boyfriend I wanted to have deep and cohesive conversations with him about the state of the world.

I loved hearing him on the phone with his friends or clients discussing weird political things; it made him sound really smart, which he is, so I figured maybe if I just tried to follow political figures on Twitter or read articles online, I’d be just as smart and have something to contribute within that topic.

Well, I got Twitter, I followed people, I tried to read the articles, but quite frankly, everything just pissed me off. I’m not into what’s going on in the world right now. It’s stressful, and life is stressful enough; why make things worse?

If I could completely distance myself from everything in the world right now and live in a house on the beach and have 5 babies, and be completely oblivious to everything outside of my tiny little world, I would — and I will.

That's the goal, anyway. I’ll let my man deal with politics. I’d rather learn how to bake sourdough.

6. Trying To Make Friends

I’ve always been an introvert. I have a few close friends in my circle, actually like 3, and we don’t talk regularly, but when we do, it’s like no time has passed between us at all.

I’ve known them all for 5+ years, and one of them is my childhood best friend, whom I’ve known since 6th grade.

I’m not an easy person to get along with initially. I’m incredibly blunt (or so I’ve heard), and I don’t sugarcoat things. Most people get offended by that, but the girls that have stuck around know my true intentions and understand that I’m not trying to be hurtful.

Over the last few years, I tried to make friends. I tried to go out with coworkers, hang out with girls who invited me out, and somehow, I’d always manage to say the wrong thing or get the side eye from someone who disagreed with my thoughts or opinions.

It’s okay to disagree — I disagree with most people, but one thing I never try to do is make someone feel like they’re stupid for thinking the way they think. I keep it to myself, and yet I was never given the same respect.

This year, after giving one last shot to someone who constantly made me feel like I was in the wrong, I decided that I was fed up with trying to make friends with people who always made me feel less than them.

I feel a lot less pressure now. Socializing is healthy, but I’ve spent the last 20~ years of my life in my own company, and I’m comfortable with myself.

Maybe eventually, good friends will come my way, but for now, I’m done forcing it and wasting my time and energy on people who don’t understand how to play nice. It’s quite freeing.